Karting as a way of self-discovery

I had my second karting lesson, and I'm beginning to think that this is not just a new hobby but also a journey of self-discovery. Besides getting my usual adrenaline and dopamine rush, it made me think about many things again.

As I might have mentioned last time, I don't do things halfway, so after the first lesson, I immediately started looking and ended up ordering a helmet for myself. So for the second lesson, I arrived with my cute floral helmet under my arm, which I proudly paraded on the subway and the bus, feeling incredibly cool and sexy.

Upon arrival, I eagerly put on my helmet, and this time we only did 3 warm-up laps because we picked up right where we left off: improving the first corner. Slowly but gradually, I managed to improve—I felt it, and it was also visible in the videos that I was starting to get the hang of it.

Afterward, we stopped for a little discussion, and honestly, I might have felt embarrassed by how many questions I asked because I'm interested in everything. Like EVERYTHING. Since I couldn't keep my mouth shut (nor did I want to), I got a quick lesson about tire wear, pressure, and similar topics. I think this is one of the things I love about karting and the whole car mania. I can go very deep into the details to understand something, and there's an almost infinite amount of little things my thirst for knowledge loves.

Another thing I love about it is that it's entirely mine. Most of the things that interest me lately can be traced back to my childhood or teenage years, but I must admit, apart from my mom proudly telling the story of "Mircsike driving a little car at the fair when she was 3-4 years old," I had virtually zero connection to cars. Now, however, my enthusiasm is driving me (no pun intended) to such an extent that I can't swim against the current, and my most authentic self comes out. What I think, feel, and how I am is just coming out of me and makes me feel free.

After discussing the tires, I kept going and started to think that the second sessions were cursed because I drove worse than ever in my life—it was a some point like driving a bumper car as I tried to rearrange the tire wall at several points. I was reassured not to worry, nothing happened, just continue as before (but preferably better—I added this part only in my thoughts), so I did, and slowly I started to feel that sometimes it was actually going quite well. Meanwhile, the track, marked out with cones, kept getting narrower so that I would follow the racing line.

Just when I was starting to get the hang of it, the session ended, but I decided that I could do better, and I wanted to continue (look what a normal amount of sleep does to a person), but now just to have fun. I had no expectations of myself, and as a result, I managed to improve my average time by about 3 seconds compared to last time. 3 seconds!! Moreover, I consistently achieved similar times in all the laps. Now I can be sure which group I belong to: those who perform well under pressure or those who perform well without it.

At the end of the session, I received the results of our first team karting and the results of the my most recent session, and I was pleased to see that my current average time was better than the best time of the team back then. Initially, my goal was something like not to be the last, not the second to last, nor the third to last when going with a team—it seems this is going quite well, though of course some actual testing would be needed.

In the meantime, I've got a taste for it, and now I'm really motivated to get better and better. During one of the laps, I had a flash of understanding Alonso's competitiveness (he came to mind because of his documentary series, where he talks a lot about how important it is for him to always win at everything), which I couldn't really relate to before.

This sport gives me a lot. While I'm having fun, I'm also on a journey of self-discovery, and I'm very curious about how many more seconds I can shave off my current time and what I will learn about myself along the way.